On low Performance

Giving and receiving feedback is one of the hardest things to do well. We never really know how it’ll land. Will it motivate? Shut someone down? Will it trigger shame, or spark change?

And it gets even trickier when we’re navigating low performance—when someone (including ourselves) isn’t quite meeting expectations.

 “Everyone is on a spectrum” is more than a slogan—it reflects a growing understanding of how differently we all learn, work, and show up.

But even in that diversity, there are standards we’re expected to meet—at work, at school, even just human-to-human. In terms of creating fluid expectations, we are still lagging behind.

Above those expectations live our goals, our dreams, and our personal definitions of success..

So, what to do?

Here’s what I’ve found most useful, both through experience and through organisational psychology:

• Ditch the vague stuff.

  
  

  Feedback like “you need to improve your attitude” is unhelpful and loaded. Be specific: What did you observe? When did it happen? What was the impact?

  
  
  
  

• More specifics, please.

  
  

  The more detail, the better. Think: “In the last team call, you missed the opportunity to present your part of the project” vs. “You’re not pulling your weight.”

• Set achievable goals—but don’t dictate the how.

  
  

  Step back and let the other person literally figure out how to get there. Next steps need to feel doable and specific.

• Offer support, then ask for feedback on your support.

  
  

  Instead of “Let me know if you need help,” try “What kind of support would be useful right now?” Then follow up with “Is what I’m offering actually helpful?”

• Circle back.

  
  

  Feedback isn’t a one-and-done event. Schedule a check-in to track progress. It builds accountability, but also shows you care.

  
  
  
  

• Don’t play therapist.

  
  

  If you suspect someone’s struggling with mental health, show care and suggest resources—but don’t diagnose. Keep things private, respectful, and grounded in what you know.

When you are the one struggling

It’s easy to turn the harshest lens inward. But the same framework applies to us, too.

If you’re feeling off your game, and you’re not ready to talk to a friend, mentor, or colleague—try turning these principles into self-reflection:

• What’s the actual evidence for my low performance?

• Where have I been vague with myself about expectations?

• Can I set 1–2 small, specific goals this week?

• Who could I ask for feedback or support?

• What would progress look like?

Call to Action

Whether you're giving feedback aim for honesty, kindness, and clarity.

Behaviourally anchored feedback increases clarity and reduces defensiveness – Kluger & DeNisi, 1996.)

Autonomy is a core psychological need—Deci & Ryan’s Self-Determination Theory, 1985

Follow-through makes feedback stick – Hattie & Timperley, 2007.